In regards to one’s love life, most people ask, “How to attract your soulmate into your life?” And not just this, they also wish to know how to attract your soulmate fast.
While I believe most of them are joking half-heartedly, this is not the best approach for finding your love interested. For one thing, attracting a soulmate is much different from attracting your soulmate.
Attracting your soulmate is more customized and sophisticated. But it doesn’t have to be a quest that makes you sad and feeling lonely.
Remember this, emotions like sad and lonely are very human, but they’re also a real downer to those around you after a while. They’ll indulge you as much as they can, but eventually, they’ll deliver some tough love, or they’ll avoid you.
Let’s look at some secrets in attracting your soulmate. I have listed “love rules “and “life rules” to take away from each section.
Keep your eagerness in check
When it comes to finding your true soulmate, it is natural to feel eager and excited. Yet if we want something too much, our focus will begin to shift to what’s lacking in our life. This is not the state of mind you want because you’ll become desperate.
LOVE RULE: Desperation is a huge turnoff and will only attract a soulmate that is bad for you.
Unfortunately, it is much too common among single people who badly want a relationship. They’re so into fretting over their loneliness; they can’t see beyond that dreary cloud they’ve created around themselves.
And this is also when we start attracting a soulmate rather than attracting your soulmate – as we discussed earlier.
Love yourself first
Indeed, you’ve heard about the importance of self-love already. The reason is that it’s vital to a healthy and happy life. Don’t take this for granted, and don’t get bored about hearing it again. However, what you should do is make sure you’ve accepted who you are.
LOVE RULE: The level of your self-acceptance always determines the quality of your relationship.
We always attract who we are and the things we’ve become. The famous author and motivational speaker Earl Nightingale once said, “You become what you think about.”
This statement is true. Everything we have in our lives and the situation in which we currently live are the results of our past thoughts. Our thoughts drive each decision we make.
Those people that psychologists call “co-dependent” are people that need the approval of others. They live their lives relying on other people to validate their self-worth. All of this stems from a low level of self-acceptance and self-love.
The good news is that they can turn this around. You start by embracing the good things in your life and feeling grateful for them. Most specifically, write down your strengths (everyone has them) and place your focus there. DO NOT compare yourself to other people. You must only focus on how you are progressing.
Humility is a great way to get into the self-love mindset. Acknowledge that you are not perfect and you made a few mistakes. Apologize for those and learn from them, and get back to focusing on your strengths.
You really need to know who you are to attract your soulmate because since we become what we think about, we need to put out the right vibe. When you do this, those people who are not good for you will gradually disappear.
This love rule played a big role in how I attracted my soulmate years ago. And we’ve been married now for almost 20 years!
Express gratitude for current loving relationships
It’s a good idea to take inventory of those wonderful relationships that you already have. Now take the time to feel very grateful for those people. Relationships are a very human element of our lifetime experience, but that gratitude you feel is quite powerful.
LIFE RULE: This is no human force of attraction greater than the power of gratitude.
This is true; when we emit feelings of gratitude, we are opening ourselves up to receive more good things in our life. From a profoundly spiritual standpoint, sages tell us that giving and receiving occur on the same level – and gratitude exists on that level as a form of receiving.
Now let me quickly point out a distinction before you get the wrong idea here. We are talking about gratitude on a general level; we are not referring to a romantic level. The reason is that you must first function powerfully and healthily before attracting the right soulmate into your life.
Gratitude can be so powerful because we’re programmed to hear so many negative forms of feedback and expression – just look at the news.
Gratitude is a refreshing change from that gloomy outlook on life that everyone seems to have. It makes you a shining star, and others begin to wonder what’s going on in your life to make you so happy.
Quit judging everything
Perhaps the most toxic element of modern society today is that of casting judgment.
For the life of me, I cannot understand the desire for constant judgment. Here are a few facts about judging others:
We naturally suck at judging. This is because we can only judge the actions of others and not their thoughts – and all their actions come from thoughts. Only our creator can judge us because only they know our true thoughts.
We judge based on our perceptions. The way we see things are biased and depend on many factors. We only need to ask several people about the same event and watch how they differ.
We are forced to defend judgments. When we judge others, they retaliate, and we are forced to defend our views. Sometimes, this is healthy, and views need to be debated – but not when you’re passing judgment about trivial matters like someone’s hairstyle or choice of companion.
Judgments require lots of mental energy. If we are not careful when we judge the external world around us, we end up defending our positions through constant mental dialog within our own minds. This practice is quite normal for judgmental people, and they often feel exhausted.
LIFE RULE: When you decide to quit judging and let the world be itself, you’ll experience more peace and have more mental energy than you can imagine.
Replace your urge to judge with a feeling of humility. When you acknowledge your own humility, you are doing the opposite of judging. It forces you to understand that people around you are making mistakes on a daily basis – just like you are.
What they need is encouragement and understanding from you. Hopefully, that’s what they’ll give you when you make your next mistake.
But humility does something else too – and that something is really special.
LIFE RULE: Sincere and authentic humility is one of nature’s most prominent rapport-building traits among humans.
When you’re willing to discuss something you did wrong, some people around you will often reciprocate. This reciprocation is a rapport-building indicator.
Humans have always been attracted to one another through their imperfections. Think back to your own experiences – hasn’t this been true?
Do you recall a person from your past that you thought was stuck-up and arrogant? But then one day they confided and admitted to you about a mistake they made?
In my life, this experience grew into one of the closest friendships I ever had.
Please be grateful and humble in your own life. Ignore those who don’t respond favorably to this; there will always be a few of them.
Eliminate obstacles against love that you have built
When you’ve had a mindset of feeling lonely and desperate, it is normal for us to make obstacles against ever finding our soulmate. If you’ve done this, do not worry, your awareness of it is a great sign.
If you haven’t done this, please read through this to make sure you haven’t – sometimes, awareness can be enlightening.
The fact is that we build these obstacles against love to protect ourselves. The Course in Miracles (which is a wonderful spiritual read) claims that we need only remove the barriers we have built against them to attract something to our lives. I have found this to be true.
The first part of this process is to remove the remnants of your past relationship. Before you can move on, you have to get rid of their physical belongings and memorabilia. Do things like getting their name off your mailbox and their voice off your voicemail greeting message.
Trying observing your surroundings through the eyes of a potential soulmate. Would you be comfortable with such things in another person’s life that you are considering as a romantic companion?
Some things and situations will be more challenging than others. Things like pictures and letters can be complicated – especially if the two of you had children together.
If you can’t get those things back to your ex-partner, find a suitable alternative such as donating to charity or giving to a relative. This is something you must do to move on to a happy relationship.
LOVE RULE: Relationships are like gardens; you must remove all the weeds and freshly plow them to get fresh new growth.
Don’t look for a Hallmark ending
Too many people get caught in the passion and feeling of love by expecting a glorious happily ever after ending their love quest. Women are especially prone to do this.
The fact is that this rarely ever happens in real life. But the good news is that your own ending and your own love quest will be even better. This is because it includes you and your soulmate. Secondly, it’s a fresh new story and not a rerun of an old book or movie. Thirdly, it’s a story that is tailor-made for you and your partner.
The Hallmark ending vision can have a harmful effect on how to attract your soul mate process. For instance, I can remember reading some personal ads describing the exact features they seek in a future soulmate.
It’s hard to find a worse way of not attracting a good relationship than this. People who specify what they physically expect in another person like this is shutting off their minds to enormous possibility and disrupting the entire process.
LIFE RULE: Sometimes, the universe is trying to give us something even better than what we think we want, but we just get in the way.
This rule applies to everything in our life.
A few years ago, our house caught on fire. I rushed to get our cat before heading out the door. My cat kept running from me.
I remember thinking, “Your crazy cat, why are you running from me? Don’t you know that I’m trying to take you to safety?”
Then I realize that this is exactly what we humans do. The universe is trying to get us to safety, but we keep running from it and preventing that from happening.
Spread your joy
The Law of Attraction tells us that likes attract likes. This is why we should fill ourselves with gratitude and humility and then spread our joy everywhere we go.
This does not mean you have to act like some crazy bubbly person who spews nonsense. Introverted people can do this. It depends on who you are, and as we discussed before, you must know yourself.
LIFE RULE: The level at which people positively respond to you depends on how authentic you are.
When you are tapped into your purpose and who you really are, you are at an optimal level. Now, this doesn’t mean everyone will love you because that’s impossible.
But it does mean that most of those who are best suited to be a part of your life will absolutely adore you. So if you feel brushed off by someone, don’t sweat it; it just means you’re on a different wavelength.
Some people wonder how to connect with your soulmate in dreams. This does happen sometimes, but I think you need to be vibrating at a pretty high level to see your soulmate in your dreams.
Remember, life should be fun – so enjoy it by spreading your joy around.
Create a great life and then invite others in
As we read along and discussed the elements of getting ready to attract your soulmate, it’s been a process of retooling the way you think and look at the world.
If you are diligent and patient, then you’ll build a wonderful life for yourself – without a love companion. This is exactly the place you want to be before sharing your life with someone.
Your self-esteem is high enough to where you will not allow someone in your life unless they enhance your world in some way. Unfortunately, the world is full of takers, so you need to be selective.
LOVE RULE: No relationship is much better than a bad relationship.
What you will discover is that people become more attracted to you when you don’t need them. When you create your own wonderful life, you show the world that you are happy by yourself. This makes you more attractive to more people around you.
When you are content with yourself, you will not settle for keeping the company of people who are bad for you. Secondly, you protect yourself against manipulation.
When you think about it, relationships can actually be simple. And we should think long and hard about this when learning how to attraction soulmates.
For instance, the most attractive person at any party is the person that expresses joy, gratitude and loves everything that is going on in their life.
And the least attractive is that person who complains about their work, who is bitter about the poor choices they made, and who focuses on everything they don’t like about their lives.
From these two statements, we can conclude one crucial and simple thing. A relationship depends on how that other person feels when they are with you and how you feel when you are with them.
Relationships are fine as long as those feelings are maintained.
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